2012年5月17日星期四

Happy Mimi Day!

The wind is blowing hard outside, it makes me think of my daughters.  How are they doing now? I am still stuck at work, lately, my right arm is so sore.  I have to use my left hand for the mouse.

Today, I forgot my ipad at home, so I can't write Chinese.  But I remember to bring the flash card here, so I have the pictures.  This year mimi's day, I got a present from my girls (of course paid by the dadddy).  It is a non-stick wok, "Ma Ma Lok".  I want to buy it long time ago.  I was watching the commercial on TV when I was still on my first pregnancy.  I said "wow, I wish that one day my baby will buy me this wok on mother's day."  Then after...many years, I finally got one!

She looks all grown-up in this pic.  That mean her mom is getting older...



We made a heart together!


We love making funny faces!


Opening my gift...so happy!




Actually my husband is very smart, my mimi's day present is good benefit for him.  Because he is washing the dishes every night.  His job will be much easier with this brand new wok!  Plus I will cook more great food for him.  Hahaha...but thank you anyway!

We decided to celebrate on Sat instead of Sunday, because taking kids out to dinner is not an easy job.  Finally my daughters treated me for dinner.  Yummy!

At first, my husband wanted to buy a white calla lily, but my sweetheart said.."oh, mimi likes purple, we should get her purple flower."  Man...she is very lovely!



2012年5月3日星期四

勇氣

最近閱讀一編新聞之後令自己心裡面非常難過,無論食飯揸車沖涼都令我想起這件不幸真人真事。美國德州有一個家庭夫妻生下女兒,但女兒被診斷有    脊髓性肌肉萎縮症(Spinal Muscular Atrophy, 簡稱SMA) 屬於體染色體隱性遺傳疾病,是因脊髓的前角運動神經元(Anterior horn cells of the spinal cord)漸進性退化,造成肌肉逐漸軟弱無力、萎縮的一種疾病,但智力發展完全正常,發病年齡從出生到成年皆有可能。經過多次戰鬥,在 4月30日只有5個月大女兒終於因為肺部衰竭而死亡。我之前從沒有留意這新聞,只是偶然在網上看到她死去消息,之後再看父母為女兒製作的bloghttp://averycan.blogspot.com/ 。那一刻我的眼淚終於忍不住,我在公司喊過不停雙眼紅腫!好在同事沒有發現。那天之後甚至這刻未能釋懷,看見自己女兒更加難過,心想BB女的父母這刻在做甚麼有想到天國的女兒嗎?

在blog入面記錄了和女兒的點滴,雖然只有5個多月,由懷孕,出生,日常生活趣事都記錄在此。有機會一定要看一看這個blog! 最後一張為女兒拍下照片她仍然微笑,疾病拿走她活動能力,連頭也沒法移動,但沒帶走她的笑容。但是為何我這個局外人會哭?心中的苦澀沒法放下!我知道自己最大缺點就是沒法放下,沒法接受失去或死亡!當聽到有關不幸新聞(尤其是關於BB)我都十分投入。我怕失去,怕死亡!怕一個人死去我便沒法再看見觸摸他or她。自己過於emotional!所以常生活於過去懷念己不在世上的人。我沒有勇氣接受失去死亡!有時候真的痛苦!但我又可以做甚麼?我希望Avery可以在天國有新生活沒有痛苦!你真的很勇敢堅強!你給我力量,我明白珍惜,能健康生活有家人我不再怕!就算我從來沒碰見Avery,但我懷念你!